because you're a little too old for school clothes...

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Since everyone is a critic...

Here's my take on the VMAs; which I wouldn't have watched if hadn't found out that Ye was gonna perform a new track...more on that later...

Here is my take on the show and its elements, in order of appearance.

Minus points for the VMAs taking place in a warehouse, Viacom has a bigger budget than that. More minus points for Brit Brit speed reading through her opening, which was terrible may I add. EVEN MORE minus points for Little Wayne getting a lip ring, it makes me not wanna get mines repierced because it is quickly about to be come the it thing to do...damn.

Plus points for Ri Ri blending Detroit and Cass Tech's own White Stripes into her performance. Russell Brand also adds points in an attempt to revive a dying show, his hilarity was greatly appreciated. Bonus points once again for the DJ AM/Travis Barker duet throughout the show. You should probably get that mixtape now...yea...

On the cusp on Jamie King's slightly [and assumable] drunken and loud "performance." Plus points for him being funny, minus points for him missing his cue live on the air...and even more minus points for MTV's poor production quality of this event. Furthermore, more minus points for all the categories being full of songs that I am tired of hearing.

Extreme plus points for Demi Moore...she is indeed a GILF.

Minus points for The Jonas Brothers performing on what looked like Sesame Street. But they earned their points back by actually having a song that ended up rocking in the end.


Plus points for the Jonas Brothers, their ensembles were awesome...Pete Wentz...not so much...

Extreme minus points on Michael Phelps and his Weezy Reference. And even more points loss for his inability to read cue cards. Hail to the victors valiant!

Ready for more minus points, because here they come. Minus points for Weezy's rendition of "He Got A Donk." Saggin' Pants aren't cool. More minus points, but plus hilarity points, for the T-Wayne Duck, Duck, Goose 5 minutes of humor, EVER!


Plus points for Leona Lewis's rendition of Nina Simone's, Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood. Plus points again for Lil' Lindsey getting off of the drugs...she looks much better now. And even more points for Fanny Pack winning the Honorable Mention award, everyone remembers second place...moving on....More plus points for the Diddy Shameless plug from Da-Diddy Kane. How he isn't even at the awards show and still visible/pertinent bewilders me.

Plus points on the Twilight Book series; only because they make it easier for bullies such as myself to find the dorky kids on the playground. Shouts out to J.K. Rowland, I see you Harry Potter!

Plus points for the Paramore performance. Nice punk rock/emo revival piece there.

Additional points for Pink. Not only is she a MILF, but the song was decent, AND you got a nip slip as added incentive. Best performance of the night!

Add em up for McLovin! Furthermore he was up there with Slipknot. Who, deny if you dare, are possibly the best MUSICIANS in rock. Go grab the last two CDs if you don't believe me. About time they are getting the recognition they deserve. Next deserving band is Mars Volta...but maybe I'm asking for too much...digressing.

Plus points for no Lil' Wayne unnecessary arrogance. I can respect a man who humbly accepts an award. But he then loses some of those points for his entourage bringing a "strange beverage" in a styrofoam cup on stage.

Boo-Radley to T.I.'s singing...and that unnecessary and terrible Numa Numa sample. But plus points to Rhianna looking scrumptious as cake on stage in that outfit. Damn girl, don't hurt 'em!

Minus points like a MAUHFUGGA for the lead singer of Tokio Hotel giggling as he and his band got off of stage from accepting that award. Minus more points for Paris Hilton not reading good and stuff either, she and Michael Phelps must have had the same classes.

Is leather in now? Minus points to that, because clearly that shit was in heavy. Everyone had on leather from T-Pain to Lupe.

Plus points to Wayne performing with Kid Rock, that was actually half decent. Detroit saves the night yet again...thank us later.

Plus a lot of points for Kobe being able to read WELL. Even more positivity for Brit Brit making a comeback, much better than last year...

Finally, the moment that we were all waiting on. K.West's performance of the new single, Love LockDown which is due to drop on iTunes tomorrow.

How do I feel about it...on the cusp...visually it was dope, aurally not so much. I don't wanna judge the entire song based off of this performance without first hearing a CDQ version.

In the lyrics of the song, "Baby I'm confused; You Choose..."

Overall, the VMAs were Dookie Charley in my opinion. But hey, if I ruled the world then ATCQ would still be dropping albums...

That is all for now kiddies,


1 comment:

gamalam said...

I agree with just about all you said, except Xtina had the best performance. Her "cover" or "remix" of "Genie In A Bottle" was killer. Now, I must say, I think she realized Brit Brit has a hit of an album on her hands that she squandered, so it's obvious she wants to make party jams too. I'm not mad at those tig ol' bitties in any way though.

And... I hate that Kid Rock song. The performance kind of made it a little better, because they broke in the different change-ups. It just makes me sad that Bob has to go so posh white trash. I don't think that will ever seem cool to me, maybe because I can never be white trash. Ghetto chic, sure. Posh white trash? Who knows.